THE CRYING GAME
One more request. I want your load.
I arrived a little early of the appointed time, found parking and parked the car. I walked up the street to a Walgreens and bought a bottle of water. On the way to his building I marveled at modern technology that allows for very little personal contact, but very efficiently gets the job done. Connection made, terms agreed upon, date and time set and I had never even talked to him on the phone.
I looked across the street and saw that he lived across from the Carlton Hotel. I chuckled to myself as I remembered staying there with a buddy at least eighteen years ago.
Darren came to San Francisco to audition for the American Conservatory Theatre MFA Actor Training Program . We rented a room at the Carlton and then went out to dinner. After dinner we walked around the area and ended up at the Mother Lode in the Polk Street District. The Mother Lode was a gay bar that catered to mostly Pacific Rim Transvestites and Transexuals and the usual suspects that like to prey upon them. I have never been attracted to men posing as women or men who want to be women, but that night a particular beauty caught me eye. She was in her mid twenties and had shoulder length very curly auburn hair. An amazing body and seemed very confident. There was a small stage at one end of the dance floor and periodically one or more of the “girls” would step up and dance. The Crying Game had come out a couple of years before and my attraction reminded me of the actor who played that role, only prettier. Similar hair though.
I moved my wallet to my front pocket as we made our way through the crowd. My ass was getting a lot of attention. I watched my girl step up onto the platform and perform an amazingly sensual dance. She played with her hair and ran her hands over her small breasts and down her body. She danced as if she was only dancing for herself and like no one was watching. It was incredibly sexy and I started to bone up in my pants. About that time someone grabbed my crotch from behind and I jumped.
“Sorry, baby, but you gotta a nice package. Want me take care of that for you?”
“OK, but you let me know if you need some help with it.” She winked and kissed the air.
I nodded and turned back to my beer and when I looked to the stage she was gone. Darren was talking with a good looking tranny who kept touching his face. He looked over at me and raised his beer. I raised mine back and searched the bar for my “Crying Game”. It was the first time I had ever even considered hooking up with a transvestite and now she was gone. I wondered what was going on down below with her. Was she still a man down there? I moved to another area of the bar searching her out and finally spotted her sitting alone. She looked sad and aloof. There was an intelligence and sophistication about her that set her apart from the others. The bar was loud and filled with laughter; high pitched and false. The music was loud. I tried to catch her eye. She looked up and saw me staring at her, holding my gaze for a moment and then turned away. She had a drink in her hand. She took a drink and looked back at me with a look that seemed to be gauging her options. She drained her glass and got up, walking away quickly. She gave me no indication if I should follow her. I stood for a moment weighing my options. She was quickly gone and I had no idea where to look for her.
“Hey man, I'm going back to the room. Can I have the key?” I pulled it out of my pocket and gave it to him. “Thanks, man, I'll see you in a bit. Give me about an hour. OK?”
Darren was standing next to me.
I watched him and his tranny make their way through the crowded bar.
This was not happening. Darren was straight and my best friend at the time. We had been through a lot and he knew I was gay and I had told him many times that I was attracted to him. We had even kissed a few times and he was always quick to tell me it did nothing for him. He should be taking me back to the room and fucking my brains out. Anger and humiliation welled up inside of me as tears threatened to fall from my eyes. I finished my beer and made my way out of the bar to the street. There was a cool breeze and I started walking.
I walked for what seemed like an hour and then made my way back to the room. There was a “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door knob and I could hear sounds in the room. Fuck! I leaned against the wall and slid down to the floor. After a few minutes I decided I didn't want to be seen waiting outside the door when she exited, so I got up and walked to a bar a few doors down and had a beer. When I finished the beer I paid the bartender and made my way back to our room. The sign was gone, so I knocked.
I walked up to his building and found his apartment number and pushed the appropriate buttons. The buzzer buzzed and I opened the door.